The Sea Of Tranquility By Katja Millay

This book was mind-blowing. I can't explain just how great this book was. It's so intense and emotional, and real. This is the kind of book for which you just have to stop once in a while to exhale and have your emotions leveled. Nearly impossible not to cry with Josh's and Nastya's histories. 

Josh and Nastya are two teenagers who had to grow up too fast, cause shit happened in their lives, that changed who they were. They both now they're fucked up and they react differently: he isolates himself and she tries to call for attention to her outside, so no one can see the true her. 
"I don’t dress this way because I like it so much or because I want people to stare at me in general. But people are going to stare at me for the wrong reasons anyway, and if they are going to stare at me for the wrong reasons, then at least I should get to pick them." 

I love Nastya and Josh's relationship. Love how they're inevitably pull to each other from the beginning, and how little by little she infiltrates in every aspect of his life, until there's domesticity between them. I LOVE how he become the first person she talks too after such a long time silent and feel the specialness in him. Love how even though he didn't understood her a bit, he left her come back every single time. 

So, at one side we had Josh, who since he was a kid started to be left alone little by little by all the members in his family, until he's the only one. We see the loneliness and the acceptance and resignation in him. And we see the strength in persuing his passion (carpentry) despite everything else. 
Then we had Nastya, his Sunshine , who has a secret buried deep, with which she has been struggling for a very long time. She hated herself, and hated everything, and was full of anger and resentment. We find out about it little by little, taking hint until she showed us 'the event'. I had to stop reading, cause I started to hiperventilate and my stomach twisted. It was such a sad and heartbreaking scene. We understand the way she is, and how she lost the most important thing in her life: her passion, the thing she was excellent at. 

Drew was a surprise. In the beginning, you can't help thinking he's the typical winner, big grin, high school jerk. But he's so much more than that: he's a true friend, and an incredible smart guy, with a good heart under his false appearance. I love how much she loved Nastya as his family and how he always knew and encouraged what happened between Josh and her. 
Clay was amazing as well. He didn't missed a beat, completely awake with everything and everyone, with a talented gift and an unique soul.

I know that at the end she didn't have complete closure, but it was ok. She found how did it to her, and I was glad that she didn't forgive or forget. She wasn't supposed to. When there's so much grief involved, you can never completely let it go, cause it has become part of you. It's how you decide to act with it, that really matters. And even though, her first dream was taken away from her, she had the strength to found and not letting go her new one. 

This book is a must read. I recommend it to everyone and hope to read more about Katja Millay 's books in the future.